What Should You Do (Or Not Do) If Your Teen Is Lonely?

More teens than ever are reporting feeling lonelier today despite being more connected to others through social media. High school seniors are more likely not to meet up with friends or go on dates than teens of years past.

Some causes of loneliness in teens is over scheduling in extracurricular activities and not connecting with peers in spontaneous outside play, which results in increased screen time. But, increased screen time often results in feelings of isolation as teens compare themselves to others leaving them often feeling lesser. This pattern leads to social isolation, which is linked to increased rates of anxiety and depression.

Here is some key information to help parents navigate their teen’s world:

Loneliness increases bullying Children who are lonely are more likely to be bullied and experience depression. Children who hang around others are less likely to be picked on which is a great reason for your child to connect with peers.

Loneliness is a part of development: Alone time is part of a teen’s development and gives teens a chance to develop their own thoughts and form their independent identity. It is not unusual for a teen to move away from friends at times in their relationships. So, not to worry or intervene if your teen is spending alone time or not hanging out with their BFF like they did before.

Staying connected to your teen helps: Know that technology based interaction does not suffice for face time with others. Talk to your teen and ask questions about how they are feeling about things that are going on with friends and most importantly listen. Also, do research and know what opportunities for social interaction are available at school and in the community and discuss these opportunities with your child. Consider enrolling your teen in:

-Sports groups

-Church groups

-Community groups

Look for red flags of more than loneliness

If you see a change in personality seek medical attention. Some feelings are beyond your child’s control and may require the help of a professional such as your teen:

-Is not acting like him or herself.

-Seems troubled for two weeks or longer

-Interacts with their peers, but says he or she does not feel understood by their peers.

-Does not feel supported by others.

-Feels no one understands what he or she is saying including family.

-Pulls away from social outlets or lack of interest in engaging in activities once enjoyed.

Realize extroverts may suffer more than introverts if they have few friends. So your teen can have others around them and still feel lonely. There are many benefits to increased connectedness to others including educational, health benefits, and overall increased happiness It is helpful if you, as a parent, equip yourself with knowledge to help your child navigate.