How to Improve Communication with Loved Ones with Dementia Over the Holidays

During the holidays, you may find yourself talking to friends, neighbors, or relatives with dementia. People with dementia often experience a decline in their conversational skills. According to the American Speech Hearing Association (ASHA). These simple steps can allow you to connect more effectively with your loved ones who have dementia during the holidays, and throughout the year:

Be concise

Speak in short, simple sentences. This will increase the comprehension of your communication partner with dementia. For example, instead of saying “We have a lot to do today, let’s eat breakfast and then go to the doctor” say “Let’s have breakfast.” Communicating one idea at a time will make it easier for for your relative or familiar to follow your train of thought. It also reduces the work your communication partner has to do to remember everything you said.

Speak more slowly

The average speaking rate, in conversation, for English speakers in the United States is 150 words per minute, but people may surpass that without noticing. People with dementia often struggle to understand others due to a fast rate of speech, but do not communicate that. A slow rate of speech for conversation is 110-150 words per minute.

In order to calculate your rate of speech, you can use the dictation function on smart phone: talk for one minute, and then cut and paste the words into a word counter like the App Word Count Notes or you can count them yourself. (This article by VirtualSpeech.com goes into additional detail about how to calculate your rate of speech and provides examples of speech at different rates.)

If you are faster than 150 words per minute, practice slowing down to 110-150 wpm to increase the chance of being on the same page with your communication partner.

Use Yes/No questions

Use Yes or No Questions versus open-ended questions. For example instead of saying, “what do you want to eat for dinner? ‘ you can ask a yes/no question like, “would you like chicken for dinner?” Or, a choice question like, “Do you want to eat chicken for dinner?” This is helpful because it reduces the stress of having to figure out a word to say which can be time consuming and stressful for both parties.   A good rule of thumb is to think through the question and expected response from your communication partner and turn it into a yes/no or choice question.

Some people with dementia may not be able to have conversations due their severity, and benefit from incorporating visual pictures to reference in communication. However, it is always good to try these tips to increase the chance of keeping them in the loop in case they have some residual comprehension skills. Practice these tips to keep your communication partner with dementia in the loop to improve their understanding for the win!